These Scars I Keep For Her
by Wings of Flight
Summary: Warning: CharDeath. Post War. Ron tells the story of why he keeps his scars.


A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any of it's characters, they belong to a very nice lady by the pen name of J.K. Rowling.

Though I could have these scars removed or 'fixed' as mum says. I don't want to. These scars are more than marks that tarnish my skin. More than reminders of what I have done to tarnish my soul. They are reminders of her. She was my all, my everything and my nothing. Only she could make the world disappear and take to a world where I drift in happiness. All the years I wasted just because of my bloody pride...Humph, well that's long gone now. Nothing really matters without her. I still remember the battle, the one where I got all my scars, the one where I lost her.

It would have been the end of our 7th year at Hogwarts had Harry not decided to leave, and had we not decided to follow. One of the few choices that, despite contributing to her death, I don't regret making. We were at Hogwarts. Voldemort had been trying to get in all year. All the attacks up until now had been smaller groups attacking from different places, and we had managed to stop them all with some of the oLder members. This time was different.

During the last attack we had lost Neville. He went out with a fight truly deserving of his spirit. He had been cornered by the werewolf Fenrir Greyback and one of his underlings, and both were transformed as it was full moon. No one was moving. Neville had his wand and he was ready to cast, but as soon as he would aim at one they would both jump him, and he knew it. He didn't have much time, as they were both edging forward slowly, and no one near him was in any position to help. With bravery worthy of Godric he chose to hit Greyback with Avada kedavra. Harry had seen the flash of green light from about 50m away where he had just put another werewolf in a full body bind. He ran towards it just in time to see something, that he says, haunts him more then anything he has seen in his life. To put it in his word, "I didn't think anyone still believed in eating someone's heart for their courage." Needless to say that Harry went into a rage that would have made Voldemort squeak. He may have only killed one werewolf that night but most of the rest ended up in full body binds. It was the also the only time I have ever seen Harry cast Avada kedavra. We all have our moments of weakness. After the death of Greyback most of the werewolves asked for repentance and to join the order. They were granted their wish. At the next order meeting, Harry demanded their headquarters be moved to Hogwarts to avoid the order being so vastly out numbered again. A good move, because the next attack was the real attack. Up until then it seemed Voldemort was simply testing his various forces and ridding them of the weak.

The students were sealed it the great hall, excluding those who were of age and had volunteered themselves to help if there were any attacks on Hogwarts. This was the first attack that had actually managed to get inside. It was chaos. We had the tactical advantage as most of the order had studied The Marauders Map and knew most if not all of the short-cuts and hidden rooms in the building. We had the map, but Harry spotted Voldemort and gave chase telling us that this was his, and his battle alone. She on the other hand was off down a corridor before I could protest to what Harry had said. She had spotted Snape on the map and he wasn't far from us. The order was NOT to kill Snape, he was to explain himself first, then you were allowed to use your own judgement. She caught him along a long hallway, disarmed him and was getting him to give her reason to kill. I got to the end of the hallway just as a door appeared along the wall about five meters behind her. Before I knew it, Malfoy had stepped out and had his wand pointed at her back. I used Avada kedavra but they were too far away and Malfoy jumped out of the way. There was nothing I could do. Before I could scream for her to move it had hit. I was frozen. Malfoy hit me with a few spells, which gave me these scars, then put me in a full body bind.

Later I found out that Malfoy had no intention of harming her and simply wanted to disarm her before she did something she would regret. It turns out Snape was innocent and had the memories from both himself and Dumbledore to prove it. I had killed her.

So I keep these scars to remind me of her. To remind me of what I did. To remind me of the deepest scar of all, the one you can't see.

I love you Hermione


End file.
